Being happy is important, especially when your dating life is active. Why?
First of all – because other people can sense your happiness or un-happiness. If you come to a date happy, your date will feel that and will respond accordingly. I did numerous tests myself, and any time I came to a date sad, grumpy or simply unsatisfied – it plain didn’t work. The girl I went on a date with just didn’t want me – plan and simple. Even if she was interested – there was a cloud of sadness or unhappiness that prevented her from getting in touch later or to respond to my attempts to contact her.
Second – it lowers your self-esteem and self-confidence. We talked about self-confidence before, so go visit that post. In short – the better you feel about yourself, the better she will feel about you. One of my dates told me that the minute she met me she felt my presence, in her words: “I felt like I am with a MAN!”. Only a few months before that another girl, just like this one was telling me that I am “not sexually attractive” and she doesn’t really want to be anything more than friends.
Last, but not least – people like to associate themselves with other happy people. Look around – how often do you see your coworkers or friends post pictures of themselves being sad, grumpy, deeply concerned or crying? You are more likely to see happy vacation faces, happy children smiles or happy romantic couples photos. Behind it there is a same reason – people want to associate themselves with happy people. It makes them happy too. So is your date – she wants others to see that she’s good and she can make her date happy.
Don’t just go on a date and kill it all out. Bring your happy face, happy thoughts, happy smiles and who knows – maybe by the same day three months from now, one sunny morning she will tell you smiling as happy as it goes: “Honey, today’s our three months anniversary”. Be happy.
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My very first girl (don’t laugh!) was a cute 6-year old. I was a 6-year old cute boy then, so there wasn’t anything illegal involved. However, being a shy guy I still am, I managed to enjoy a continuous kissing sessions behind some abandoned building. She was, of course, against it, but I was damn persuasive. Besides, we all wanted to know what it feels like and why all those men and women on TV made such a big fuzz about it. Remember, we were 6, we had no idea what the hell the porn is.
Must admit – it doesn’t sound like much and it wasn’t much then. But now come to think of it – I was the earliest among my peers to start dating and actually got to a second base. She bragged about it even more then I did. We were heroes.
We didn’t even break up. Her parents moved to another part of town, so she went to a different kindergarten. Short story.
Technorati : dating, memoirs
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These days, striking out with the opposite sex is as simple as buying a webcam and “being yourself.” Thanks to Digg, where we found this beautiful story.
The commentaries are pretty obvious. This is just to illustrate that you should get creative in your dating behavior. Just don’t forget that you may end up on Esquire web page – and it ain’t going to be a good rap.
digg story
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You hook up with this great guy or gal. You exchange your phone numbers, you called each other couple of times. You set up a date. Ten minutes before the Hour H he called and said he has an emergency meeting. Or she called and said her mom got sick. You reschedule for tomorrow.
Tomorrow you get yourself ready, but 15 minutes before date he calls and says there’s an emergency at work and he needs to be there ASAP. Or she calls and says that her best friend got into car accident and she has to be there for her. You reschedule for next week.
Next week… well, you’ve got the idea. You are puzzled, because you still haven’t been on a single date with the person, so why all the avoidance? The answer is simple – the person you are trying to date is unavailable and this is exactly how such unavailability looks like in real life. The person could be married, or have a full-time girlfriend, or engaged, or… well, whatever. Point is – they play this game for either of two reasons: a) they need some excitement, and b) they want to see other people but can’t. Mainly because their other half wouldn’t let them.
Getting stood up because your date isn’t honest with you isn’t a pretty sight. Some ladies suggest that you keep couple of opportunities open for any night. If one of them failed, you can always roll back to another. Since you are not into anything serious yet, there is a high chance it will make sense. Also, there is nothing wrong with this, since this will boost your self-esteem and will just make you feel good.
Of course, if you really like the person, you’ve been on more then three dates with him or her and really want to show it – you wouldn’t do anything like this. On the contrary, offer your help, a lift to a place or a hand to help. Never worked for me though, but you may just be a little luckier.
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